In perhaps his best unintentionally comedic performance yet, actor Jon Voight manages to keep a straight face while declaring that Trump is “the greatest president since Abraham Lincoln” in a video posted on — where else? — Twitter.

Behold “To My Fellow Americans. Part One.” (YES! There’s already a sequel!)

To my fellow Americans. Part 1. pic.twitter.com/srw4zXCRKJ

— Jon Voight (@jonvoight) May 25, 2019

Trump “has made his every move correct,” Jonny says (“EVERY MOVE!”), adding that “our country is stronger, safer and with more jobs” with him at the helm–but failing to mention that most of those jobs were Trump’s own defense attorneys.

To my fellow Americans. Part 2. pic.twitter.com/uhqpbzwHhS

— Jon Voight (@jonvoight) May 25, 2019

“This job is not easy, for he’s battling the left and their absurd words of destruction,” J-Vo, 80, solemnly intones. “Our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers, and there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln.”

When asked to comment on the comparison of Trump to himself, Honest Abe responded:

“Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in liberty and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. (Oops! And women.) Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether we can survive a moronic, narcissistic man-toddler as the president of this otherwise great nation…”

Wow, this is really getting out of hand. Someone just doctored video of @realDonaldTrump to make him sound more presidential. pic.twitter.com/iR1D2oMawg

— John Aravosis 🇺🇸 (@aravosis) May 24, 2019

After the distorted video of Nancy Pelosi made the rounds yesterday, another misleadingly edited video has hit the Internet — this one created to make Donald Trump sound presidential and capable of stringing multi-syllabic words together. What a disappointing misrepresentation of the truth. Shame on you, Internet!

INTRODUCTION

I’m gonna skip this part, just like I skipped classes at Penn and the Senate Intelligence Committee hearing. Because I can get away with shit like that, bitches!

CHAPTER ONE

My Life as Donald J. Trump’s Firstborn Son
“Punch down, not up, you stupid fucking moron!” my dad would always encourage me.

CHAPTER TWO

My Life as Ivanka’s Brother
“Why can’t you be smart and hot like your sister, you stupid fucking moron?!” my dad would always wonder.

CHAPTER THREE

My Life, My Rules
How I’ve written my own rules for success, based solely on trying to earn the approval from my dad that I so desperately long for.

CHAPTER FOUR

My Overcompensation
How killing large, beautiful animals for no reason makes my penis feel less small.

CHAPTER FIVE

My Work for the Less Fortunate and Disenfranchised
[MISSING CHAPTER]

CHAPTER SIX

My Russian Tower Meeting
Er… I mean my Trump Tower meeting! That never happened. Certainly not with any Russians. Okay, maybe there were Russians, but no collusion! Okay, maybe a teensy bit of collusion, but my dad didn’t even know about it! Much. I mean, say what? I’m not scared, YOU’RE SCARED. *Ahem* Should I post more emails on Twitter? Retweet another doctored video of Nancy Pelosi? TELL ME WHAT TO DO, DADDY!

CHAPTER SEVEN

My MAGA Love
All of my dad’s accomplishments the fake news media refuses to report: has created record-breaking number of job opportunities defense attorneys; leading fight against “very fine” White Nationalist patriots; only disclosed nuclear codes to Russians – nobody else!; invented the word “covfefe”; singlehandedly boosted fast food business with fine spreads offered to athletes visiting White House.

CHAPTER EIGHT

My Future
Imagining myself in prison, having taken the fall for my dad, and wondering if he loves me yet. Or if he’ll ever visit or write me back. Totally hypothetical, of course.

SEE ALSO: These Suggested Titles for Donald Trump Jr’s New Book Are Hilarious